Definition of an Eejit Part XIV

I've done something I thought I'd never do in my time here in Malta....I got on the wrong bus!

For the first two shifts back in the office after my UK break, I've left work at exactly 2pm, walked down to the bus stop, and on both occasions a number 62 bus has pulled up into the lay-by almost immediately. Both times it was busy, but with a few seats still free, and on both occasions I've walked in the front door of my apartment at 2.30pm. Was there any reason to doubt it would happen a third time?

Third shift, again I leave the office at exactly 2pm, again I walk down to the bus stop and as I arrive the number 62 pulls up, again it's busy but seats still available, so surely I'm destined to walk into my front door at 2.30pm for a third time? Well I would have been if it had been the 62...it turned out it was the number 42 and was going no where near my apartment!

Of course I didn't know it was the wrong bus as I took my seat near the front - in fact, for the first couple of miles it took the route I expected it to. It was at the roundabout just after the Exotic Pet Store that things turned for the worst. Instead of heading right towards Sliema, it carried straight on, and headed into the unknown.

How would you react? I wasn't going to ask a passenger 'what bus is this?' for two reasons. Firstly it makes me look stupid if I don't know what bus I'm riding on, and secondly, even if they tell me 'it's the 42' that doesn't help me work out where I'm heading!

So, when do I get off? Do I get off straight away, possibly still in walking distance of home? (although without a clue in which compass direction I'd need to head in to find Sliema) Do I wait to see if I recognise a landmark? (again unlikely, I haven't exactly explored much of the island, and as I know it's not heading in the direction I was hoping, I can't imagine something would seem fimilar. Do I stay on until the end of the journey and then just get a bus back in the opposite direction? (Dangerous as it could be a long way, and may enter a different fare zone, and then I'd be travelling on an invalid ticket)...

..What I chose to do was wait until the bus was fairly empty and then got off when a group of other people got off (rather than a stop where only one person got off). My logic seemed to say if lots of people want to alight here, it must be a popular place and easier to find my way back. That is logical isn't it?

Ok, so where was I? I had just passed a big Lidl supermarket, there was a dual carriageway next to me, and a nursey school with kids in the playground. Not much help so far. Across the road was another bus stop, so I dodged the traffic and stood in the shelter. After no more than 5 minutes a number 65 bus turned up, and with trepidation I held out a 50c coin to the driver and said 'Are you heading to Valetta?'

My head was telling me, 'get to Valetta and start again.' Yes it would mean two more buses but at least I wouldn't be lost anymore.

The driver replied: 'No, I don't go as far as Valetta, only to Sliema'.

You'd think I had just won the lottery by the broad grin plastered across my face. I think the driver was a little stunned I still wanted to ride on his bus, considering it wasn't going to Valetta, but little did he know he was actually going to take me home. 20 minutes later I was pulling up at the same stop I catch my morning bus from, arriving home in the opposite direction to the one I'm used to. Instead of 2.30pm, I was walking into the flat just after 3pm, but at least I was home.

There are a few curious things to consider about this adventure though...

1. Recently I've taken to only bringing my exact bus fare with me. two lots of 47c. Yesterday, however I had a few loose coins I'd forgotton to take out of my coat pocket after a night out, so I had enough for two more buses if I needed them.

2. I only discovered the extra coins while I was on the wrong bus. If I'd discovered them on the way to work, I probably would have bought a bottle of Pepsi or 7up with them (I'd been craving a cold drink all day).

3. According to the Malta Transport timetable I checked when I got home, the 65 bus should have cost 1.16 per ride (which I didn't have) but the driver only charged me the standard 47c. I still don't know why he did that.

...So perhaps the God were taking pity on me because I was being such an eejit.