My Magnificent Octopus Part III

This is going to be harder than I ever imagined.

Ok, so I have my basic story. I have characters established and I have plot lines. I have red herrings I can introduce and I have a sort of love interest. I have locations and I have some interesting twists. What I can't do so well is get it down on paper and make it readable.

I was onto chapter 3 with my first draft. I was writing it from the perspective of the main character in the first person "I did this, I did that etc". At first I thought it was working, and it was really easy for me to 'flow'. All I had to do was put myself in his position and write about what I would do. But now I have read my first draft back with fresh eyes and it's rubbish. I wouldn't give it shelf space.

So now I'm onto draft 2. I'm back writing in the third person "He did this, he did that etc". It means I can detach myself from the detective whenever I want to and write about something else. I'm onto chapter 2 so far, and this time it is much fuller. In draft 1 I was trying to get every piece of information into the first few lines, but now things are being introduced more gradually. I think it sounds a lot better, but I'll know better when I read it back with fresh eyes in a few days time.

I'm tempted to get someone to read the first few chapters when I think I'M happy with them, just to see if I'm not being blinded by my own writing. If someone reads it and their response is they want to read the rest I know I'm on the right lines. If their response is they struggled to get through it and couldn't care about the ending, I know it's back to the drawing board.

I am determined to finish it, even though I know it's unlikely to be published. It will just be something I can look back on and say 'I made this'....

...plus it'll be a cheap Christmas present for my Mum! :o)